you have every reason to doubt me
with all that you have been through

that's why I could never be upset with you
it's not that I never get upset at all
you know I do, in missing you

it is just that I will not be selfish
 by having expectations for you to fulfill
especially
when you are in the depths of your pain

alchemy of me
transmutation of lead into gold
in order to free myself
to love fully and completely
to be able to give the way I want to

to give to you the freedom
to feel your own feelings
without the burden of mine